I’ve learned not to ask Mom for directions,
To circumvent getting hopelessly lost.
Despite her overwhelming objections,
I avoid her instructions at all cost.
Get on the highway, then off at the school,
Continue to the second boulevard,
Then right at the place you fill up with fuel,
And left at that house with the Saint Bernard.
Continue past three stop lights on that street,
Until you get to that nice indoor mall.
Make a right at that yummy place to eat,
Then left where your stepdad found that golf ball.
I leave the house with a thank you and smile,
And map, vowing not to ask for a while.
“I have an existential map. It has ‘You are here’ written all over it.” ~ Steven Wright