Trade-In

There once was a man from Nantucket,
Don’tcha know that’s somewhere near Boston.
He once resided in Phucket,
Along with his brother named Austin.

One day the two had an altercation,
That was, in fact, quite severe.
It happened whilst they were on vacation,
And has been going on for over a year.

Nantucket dude—his name was Dallas,
(Also named for a city in Texas.)
Had “relations” with his sister-in-law, Alice,
In the back of Austin’s new Lexus.

The two resorted to fisticuffs,
And a bloody confrontation ensued.
Far worse than any previous scruffs,
A truly immense magnitude.

Austin filed for divorce,
After all, Alice was completely untrue.
He calmed himself on the golf course,
And realized his wife was a shrew.

Dallas and Alice eloped,
Austin spends time with his friends.
His life is better than he hoped,
With his cherry red Mercedes Benz.

“I have learned that not diamonds but divorce lawyers are a girl’s best friend.” ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

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